Holiday Self Care Tips 2020
/A Few easy tips for a less-stressful holiday season.
Another holiday season is upon us and this year, with the added uninvited guest named COVID-19, our stress levels are encroached upon. In “normal” times we experience additional stressors such as gift buying, travel coordinating and nonstop seasonal soundtracks playing in the background. We can become attuned to overwhelm, disappointment, emotional eating, and overindulgence. Between event planning, shopping, cooking, managing relatives, and trying to complete the 100 other tasks "necessary" for a good holiday, it's no wonder many people lose sight of what keeps them physically healthy and mentally grounded throughout the rest of the year. Our holiday experiences do not have to be that way. With just a little thought and planning, you can survive – and even thrive – this holiday season – even with the added guest named COVID-19.
1. Keep exercise and body movement essential. Physical activity is a recommend tip to everyone because it reduces stress, improves mood and concentration, and combats depression and anxiety. Decades of research shows that even just ten minutes of vigorous exercise daily triggers the same hormones in your brain (serotonin and dopamine) targeted by anti-anxiety and antidepressant medications. Regular exercise builds up levels of these important nervous system regulators, becoming a tonic for stress, anxiety, and depression. When it comes to improving how you feel, getting regular exercise is an easy and affordable way to combat stress.
During the holidays, people tend to skip their workout to make room for more seasonal activities. This is not helpful. You add potentially stressful situations and lose your stress reliever in one action. Instead, do what you can to maintain your exercise schedule. If you do not have time to go to the gym or take a long run, simply scale back. Go for a 10-minute walk or do some light stretching, rather than skipping your workout entirely. Yoga is always a recommended and welcomed activity to help with stress relief. Even now, during COVID-19, free virtual yoga classes are readily available online from beginner to advanced. Take advantage!
2. Get in touch with gratitude. Guess what else protects your brain from stress and depression? Gratitude. Recent neuroscience research shows that simply pondering the question, "What am I grateful for?" increases dopamine and serotonin. Just searching for things to be grateful about builds stronger positive emotional pathways in your brain. Start a daily gratitude list or begin a gratitude journal that you spend time focusing on appreciation.
3. Protect your sleep. One of the most important aspects of our daily living that can impact our emotional and physical health is chronic insomnia and poor sleep patterns. This can lead to weight gain, increased stress, and crankiness. Most of us have poorer sleep habits this time of year whether from staying out late attending parties, shopping or leaving all the gift-wrapping until the last minute. Losing sleep over organizing and creating the perfect meal or present will not make you or your family happier or healthier over the holidays. Consistent quality sleep will help keep the stress levels more in check. Worry over how to plan for and execute a COVID protocol friendly holiday gathering may impact your sleep. What is the safest and healthiest way to honor my sleep patterns this season? Consistent sleep enhances the immune system. Protect your sleep.
One idea is to cut back on caffeine and eliminate it entirely after the early evening and lay off the eggnog and alcoholic beverages before bed. Skipping naps, especially the ones that find you curled up on the couch after a big meal, will improve your ability to fall asleep at night. And though it will be challenging, take a pass on the goodies in the cabinet or leftovers in the fridge for at least three hours before bed. Heartburn, indigestion, or a sugar headache can tend to keep you awake. Consistent and healthy sleep routines are beneficial.
4. Feel your feelings. Do not “medicate” your feelings with things like; food, drink, busy-ness, avoidance, drama. The holidays often bring up strong feelings for people around everything from family losses, new relationships, to meeting the high expectations of visiting family. Although most of us would rather avoid those difficult emotions – through the time-honored holiday traditions of eating or drinking – rather than just accepting that it is natural to feel them this time of year. Because of COVID-19, this year’s family gatherings may be different. There may be fewer people. There may be people who are absent because they are in the “high risk” category and we want to protect their health. This can generate feelings of loss and grief. Feel those feelings, don’t stuff them.
In the short run, emotional eating and drinking can be an effective way to distract or disorient you from strong and sometimes painful emotions. But it doesn't work in the long run, leaving you with the same anxiety about difficult emotions, a potential dependence on alcohol or food to self-soothe, and 5 or 10 extra pounds that won’t be easy to lose. Over the last several months, since the start of COVID-19 restrictions, many of us have gained a few extra pounds. Obesity or “carrying the extra weight” can add to risk factors if there is a positive COVID test and you contract the virus. Healthy meal planning and weight awareness are helpful to our overall lifestyle.
If you notice yourself reaching for something to eat or drink in response to a difficult feeling, try to identify what is going on instead. Are you angry with your partner? Are you grieving the loss of relative or friend? Are you anxious about a gathering? Are you concerned about COVID-19 protocols with your family members? Are you sad about a recent break up? The more you try to identify your emotions, the less scary and dangerous they become. Once the emotions are identified, become aware of your body sensations and attend to being “with” the feelings vs. avoiding them. As we practice this, the easier it gets to sit with the feelings rather than attempt to numb them.
5. Be in the present moment. One of the things that affects holiday enjoyment is becoming so wrapped up in planning the “best holiday experience ever” is that you lose the ability to experience the good moments that happen in the present. While you worry about whether everyone is happy with the meal, if anyone is fighting about national or world events, or if the kids are eating too much sugar, you miss the powerful, gratifying, present moments that make the holidays magical. Mindfulness of the magical moments can also add to your gratitude list.
One great way to start embracing the present moment is by taking a few minutes to find one thing you feel good about right now, and then lingering on that thought for as long as you can. When you stop trying to make your holiday fit a pre-conceived notion, you open up space to savor the holiday in the present moment.
6. Keep a regular schedule – including taking breaks for self-care. What does your normal day look like? Do not neglect your well-established routines during the holidays. Try waking up and going to bed at your regular times. Take regular walks, exercise plans, social engagement meetings, support group meetings, and spiritual practices. Just because it is the holidays, does not mean that the routine that works for you throughout the year takes a holiday. Taking breaks when things become too overwhelming or you find yourself saying “yes” when you really want to say “no”, means that a respite is needed. It can be a 10 minute “time out” to just close your eyes and notice your breathing, look at nature, listen to some music, or just sit in silence. Taking breaks refreshes our nervous system and helps us to stay more focused and regulated. We honor ourselves when we notice what our body needs from us.
Remember what the holidays are for. It is not about finding the perfect gift or throwing the perfect party. It is not about who has the best holiday decorations. It is about celebrating and honoring our traditions with the people who are most important to us. It is about nurturing our spirituality. It is about creating memories that can be carried with us and are a greater happiness than material things and status can provide. Let us take special care this unique COVID-19 holiday season and take extra-special care of ourselves and our loved ones.
Happy Holidays to All
Nancy Bailey, PhD